3 Strategies to Help Your Kids Thrive this Summer
By Margaret Vadiee, PhD, Katie Sardone, PhD & Madison Shealy
School’s out! Vacations, summer camps, and long unstructured days are here. It can be quite a transition for your children (and yourself!) to leave the familiar school routine and face the unknowns of summer. Dr. Margaret Vadiee, Pediatric Psychologist, offers 3 strategies to help your family embrace change and seize the summer!
Prepare Your Child
Summer is filled with constantly changing routines and new experiences for you and your child. Informing your child in concrete details about what will be happening this summer, such as upcoming travel, camps and activities, will help them feel more comfortable and confident.
Pro Tip: Dr. Vadiee recommends helping your child fill out their own calendar with the who, what, where and how all written out (e.g., event dates/times, where it takes place, who could be there, and which caregiver will be taking them).
The “How” Matters:
Use an enthusiastic tone of voice and positive language to show your children that you are confident in their capability to take on the summer.
Validate any feelings or concerns your child has about the summer to help them feel seen, heard and cared for. For example, if your child is feeling fearful, let them know it’s normal to feel nervous before trying something new.
Repeat these steps! Children often need reassurance and repetition. It’s okay to re-explain new situations as many times as they need. Continuing to demonstrate your belief in their autonomy and ability to be successful in these new situations will allow them to remember these words, internalize them and believe them themselves.
Set Expectations Across Caregivers:
In the same way that your child needs to be prepared for the summer, the adults in your child’s life also need to know what to expect with the change in season. Think through practical elements of upcoming changes and fill in your partner, other family members and any other childcare providers so everyone is on the same page. Demonstrating clear and consistent expectations across caregivers and settings can reduce nervousness in children and increase a sense of confidence and control.
Manage your Own Thoughts, Feelings & Expectations:
Summer can come with challenges for parents too! Maybe it’s difficult to come up with fun activities or figure out how to create structure in the day. If you find yourself feeling anxious or despairing about the summer, a change in your perspective can foster a more positive outlook.
Find a Helpful Mindset: You may find yourself getting stuck in an unhelpful loop of “My child is so bored!” “I can’t provide the epic summer I want for my child,” or “This lack of routine is so hard to handle!” Summer can be hard, that’s true. Allow yourself to accept that feeling, validate it, and then intentionally redirect your thoughts to a more helpful line of thinking. For example, remind yourself that summer is temporary and the structure of school is right around the corner. Challenge yourself to seize the moment knowing that things will inevitably change.
Easy Entertainment: You don’t have to provide an expensive, elaborate summer for your child to be entertained and happy. Children enjoy learning about the world around them. Creating a fun day for your child could be as simple as turning on the water hose and declaring that it is Swimsuit Day!
Set Goals: While planning the summer, it may be helpful to set goals for yourself. Setting goals can help you feel accomplished and less stressed about the summer ahead of you. For instance, summer is pretty short, so a goal could be to find one activity that you enjoy doing with your child this week. Set goals that work for you, your schedule, and your child.